Dear Wiggle Worm,
So you’ve tried meditation because it supposedly has all these great mental and health benefits, and it felt–I’m just guessing–boring (It’s only been a minute?! It’s felt like twenty…), excruciating (I’m supposed to sit still for how long??), or impossible (Quiet my thoughts? LOL).
I feel you. I’ve been there.
However, I, a fellow wiggle worm, have actually (more or less) successfully implemented meditation into my (almost) daily life now AND it’s a positive addition I take joy and mental health benefits from.
Let me tell you how.
We’re going to break it down into 3 categories.
Building a strong foundation
Setting yourself up for success
Breaking the rules
ONE: BUILDING A STRONG FOUNDATION
“Start with a small, easily achievable goal. I suggest starting with 5-10 minutes three times a week or every other day. Or less!”
If you’re going to start meditating, or any good habit for that matter, there is some groundwork you should lay before you begin.
Identify the reason you want to meditate in the first place. For me, I wanted to declutter my headspace, be more present in the moment, and feel more in control of my thoughts and emotions. If the only reason you want to meditate is because you should, that may be exactly why it’s not working out for you. Who cares if other people meditate? If you don’t want to, then don’t.
Start with a small, easily achievable goal. I know it’s tempting to envision yourself meditating for 30 minutes to an hour every day, in a blissful realm of peace and wisdom. Perhaps someday that will be your life, but please don’t expect yourself to start there or beat yourself up when you can’t do it. I suggest starting with 5-10 minutes three times a week or every other day. Or less! When you are consistently meeting the small goal you set, make it a little bigger. Repeat until you are satisfied with where you are.
Add meditation into an already well-established part of your routine. For example, as part of your morning or bedtime routine (I highly suggest having even the simplest of those), after you work out, or on your break at work.
Have some sort of accountability or reward ready. Accountability could like making an agreement with a friend to check in with each other each day or at the end of the week to see if you’ve met your meditation goal and they’ve met a goal of their choice. A reward could be something like a piece of chocolate, watching a YouTube video, or a certain amount of time on social media. Whatever you choose to do, try to tap into what motivates you.
TWO: SETTING YOURSELF UP FOR SUCCESS
Time to get more specific in regards to meditation and in terms of your personality.
Figure out what kind of meditation appeals most to you. Turns out there’s actually a lot of types of meditation. A quick internet search just might lead you to a meditation style which works for you far better than whatever stereotype you have in your mind.
Choose the time of meditation wisely. Think about the time of day you not only could use meditation the most but will actually be most likely to do it. Perhaps you find yourself most scattered and stressed during the work day. Trying a quick meditation as part of your break could help recharge you for the rest of the day. Or maybe you have a hard time, like me, quieting your brain to fall asleep. Meditation could be a great way to drain your brain of excess thoughts before you climb into bed. On the flipside, it’s very possible, particularly if you have ADHD, that you have used up all willpower by the evening. Expecting yourself to implement a habit which requires self-discipline at the end of the day could be setting yourself up for failure. Instead, try a time of day when you feel most alert and have the least distractions.
Nail down your resources. If you don’t have what you need to start meditating at the time you want to start meditating, you are probably more likely to put off doing it. However, if you already have, let’s say, a YouTube playlist with guided meditations that appealed to you or a free app you’re going to try the transition into the new habit will be all that much smoother.
Be intentional about your environment. As a beginner, it’s probably best not to choose a super loud and/or distracting place to meditate if you can. Some location ideas include: alone in your bedroom or car, at your kitchen table while you drink your morning coffee or tea, a secluded place in nature, or if you’re a weirdo like me you could always sit in your closet because it’s quiet and dark. Noise canceling headphones can be helpful for limiting distractions as well.
THREE: BREAKING THE RULES
Time to tap into your natural desire to rebel.
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Position yourself how you want. Just because someone instructs you to sit in a chair with your hands in your lap and your feet on the floor doesn’t mean you have to. Curl up in a ball in your chair, lay in your bed, put your feet up on the coach. Do what feels the most comfortable and least distracting for you.
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Move. Again, just because someone tells you to be still doesn’t mean you have to (in fact, there are meditations you can do while walking). You can walk around or have something to fidget with. Especially at the beginning of my meditation journey, I would ignore the directions of how to sit and instead do some light stretches while I listened. I still found a lot of benefits from this practice. Even today I rarely sit how they tell me to sit and the satisfaction of rebelling is just a cherry on top.
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Find stillness or peace elsewhere. Listen to a meditation during a regular activity like getting ready in the morning, going for a walk, or eating dinner. If you’re someone who constantly has podcasts, Audiobooks, or music playing in the background, replace some of that for calm instrumental music or white nature noise. Do something in silence you normally fill with sound, like driving to work, exercising, doing dishes, or taking a shower. While I highly recommend meditation, if it’s not for you, there are other ways to ground yourself. And that’s okay!
(By the way, if you’re serious about getting into mediation, I highly recommend The Waking Up App by Sam Harris.)
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